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Slate.fr article (FRENCH): La domination financière

Cher fans français! J’ai eu le plaisir d’être interviewée par Slate.fr sur ma pratique de la domination financière. Lire l’article dans son intégralité ici.

Extrait:

Dans l’univers du BDSM, une branche existe: la domination féminine. Et cette dernière peut prendre plusieurs formes: fétichisme des pieds, contrôle de la chasteté, bondage… La liste est infinie et peut donc aller jusqu’au findom, pour financial domination. Le cashmeet, c’est par exemple un des grands plaisirs de Theodora, qui se présente elle-même comme dominatrice financière d’élite sur Twitter, où elle est suivie par près de 20.000 personnes. «Bien sûr, c’est quelque chose qui leur plaît de donner de l’argent aux pieds de leur déesse, comme ils nous appellent», lance-t-elle. Pour elle, la pratique ne se fait pas devant un distributeur mais dans un cadre plus intimiste. En faveur de cette offrande, elle échange quelques minutes avec le soumis, appelé dans le jargon money slave.

«On peut coupler aussi avec un autre fétichisme. Par exemple, beaucoup d’hommes ont le fantasme des talons hauts. Et donc on va dans une boutique Louboutin, par exemple, et ils me regardent de loin essayer des chaussures, et en choisir une avec leur argent. J’aime vraiment beaucoup les Louboutin…», glisse dans un sourire la femme de 29 ans.

Interview for SputnikNews

I was recently interviewed by SputnikNews to speak about sex, power and cryptocurrencies… Read the entire interview on Sputniknews.com or keep scrolling…


Sex, Power & Cryptocurrencies: Financial Dominatrix on Expensive Modern Fetish

 

Forget everything you know about the adult sex industry – financial domination is here to change the game, with the cryptocurrency evolution cementing the flexibility of the process. Financial dominatrix Theodora spoke to Sputnik about the role of digital money, her “cryptominers” and what it means to be in control of someone’s bank accounts.

She has been doing it for over 8 years now. Theodora, the financial dominatrix, who is originally from France and currently residing in Paris, explains that she is not a sex worker in the traditional notion of it.

“I am in a very grey area because what is sexual to my clients is not sexual to me. There is no penetrative sex, so it is hard to define my work as sex work in France. I don’t qualify for this,” she told Sputnik.

What she does do is practice financial domination with her clients who are located all over the world — politicians, CEOs, finance professionals. In other words: people with big responsibilities and even bigger pockets.

 

Sputnik: What does being a financial dominatrix mean?

Theodora: Financial domination is a power exchange based on the finances of the person who wants to be dominated. The tool for transferring power in this case is money. When I started to do financial domination, it wasn’t a business for me. It was a fetish game. I used to go to swingers or BDSM parties and people would submit to me — they were my play partners. Because it is financial domination, they would give me money.

My clients obviously know about money, it is so much more exciting if I take it from them. They want to feel excitement from money being taken out of their accounts but they don’t want to actually be broke. That’s the fantasy but it’s not the point. We discuss the limits with them. Everything I do I make sure it is consensual and they want it. That’s the difference between a good dominant and someone who doesn’t understand the concept. Financial domination is becoming more and more popular because it is not taboo anymore to say you are a financial dominatrix or submissive.

At first I didn’t see it as a business.

 

Sputnik: When did you start accepting cryptocurrency?

Theodora: I started accepting cryptocurrency as deposits. It is safer for any sex worker and it also was the case for me. It means that the person is very serious in their request. I started to get cryptocurrencies very early on, probably 5 or 6 years ago. For me these were gifts from my play partners, who would give me cryptocurrency and back then I didn’t know how much it was worth. I accepted it and created crypto-addresses where I would collect it and of course its value grew. Now I’m starting to make it a more important part of my business because growth in the value of cryptocurrency, it’s becoming interesting financially.

Now I have my own website, people can message me but I rarely meet them. I don’t need to meet them.

 

Sputnik: How does cryptocurrency compare to more traditional money processors in your experience?

Theodora: We can’t use processors like PayPal as adult entertainers or sex workers because they would shut down our accounts. There are clipsites that offer a way to receive tributes, but the downside is they take very big cuts, usually about 30 or 40 percent. If you are into financial domination, you are more likely to get very big sums of money, and using cryptocurrencies would get you 100% of it.

With financial domination, [we] don’t actually charge for a session. It is part of the game I have with my clients. There is a certain budget and I am within its limits. Of course, cryptocurrency evolves and its value changes, but then my rate will evolve with the client, as I am adjusting to the client’s budget at the moment.

 

Sputnik: How much do you make per month in cryptocurrencies and how do you spend it?

Theodora: It varies a lot. It’s usually between 5 and 20 thousand [euro], it varies a lot. There is no one month like the other.

I like to invest in smaller cryptocurrencies because [they] are the most stable ones for now. I believe that some of them will be very big later on. Everyone talks about Bitcoin and obviously it was the first and the most well-known cryptocurrency. But I feel like other cryptocurrencies will be more important in the future. I don’t have a financial background, but the funny thing is many of my clients were in finance and they talked to me and I learned from them. Now, I am teaching [my clients]. I really like Monero, which is one of the safest, it leaves no trace and doesn’t cost as much per transaction as Bitcoin. With Bitcoin you have to wait for a couple of days to get the money — that’s a long time, whereas with some others it is almost instant.

 

Sputnik: What is femdom hypnosis?

Theodora: Some people would like to submit but find it hard to give up control mentally. For them, the physical state of domination is not enough, that’s where hypnosis comes in. It gives them, what is called the “subspace” they want to reach. They relinquish control to me via hypnosis.

 

Sputnik: When you are given control of a person’s bank account as part of financial domination, what are your actions?

Theodora: It depends on the client. Some of them will be turned on by paying my bills, so I would pay my bills with their credit card. Some like to buy sexy lingerie for me, so I would shop and show them what I bought myself with their money. Some just want to see big numbers withdrawn from their accounts.

Most of the time they don’t know what turns them on, so I have to experiment and when I find what it is — that’s what I will do.

 

Sputnik: Do you have people mining cryptocurrencies for you?

Theodora: I make some of my clients buy mining computers, which generate calculations to create money that goes to my cryptoaccount. The number of people doing it for me evolves, but it’s at least 10-15 people.

The people that find out about me on social media wouldn’t attend swingers or fetish parties. They wouldn’t have the same budget for financial domination. I try to make financial domination more accessible to them — I would provide them with opportunities to send me smaller tributes, knowing that I would never get the same amounts as from real-time clients.

 

Sputnik: What are you plans for the future?

Theodora: I have a lot of projects right now. My main focus would be to continue producing videos and art related to fetish and domination.

 

Sputnik: Are you taxed for your work?

Theodora: My videos are taxable and in France the taxman takes a huge cut. So it is a good thing that I have financial domination going on with all the donations. Donations are not taxable, provided it is within a limit of 50,000 twice a year.

 

THE ART OF FEMDOM

I have been featured on iWantBlog to talk about my short film “The Manipulatrix”, what inspired me to do it, my artistic influences and how I view Femdom. See my featured article along with my film on iWantBlog or read below…


Female domination is the kink where a presumably submissive male protagonist (or more rarely, a submissive female, queer, or gender non-conforming individual) is being sexually dominated by a dominant female figure. While this often brings to mind images of a leather or latex-clad woman castigator, with whips and chains and a dungeon to match, the modern reality of Female domination is far more diverse and equally intriguing…

 

Femdom in Fashion

For years, fashion has been guilty of borrowing the “Dungeon Dominatrix” aesthetics, using its codes, sometimes twisting them during the process, and feeding them to the mainstream audience. We have all seen music videos starring pop singers wearing latex gowns, with sometimes added contradictory accessories such as whips or crops paired with choker necklaces. Fashion loves fetishism and its symbols, overuses and abuses them, but who can blame them? What’s not to love about luxurious, full leather catsuits or thigh high boots, mirror-like, glazed figure-hugging dresses or huge chokers and leather masks? Contrasting with the traditional concept of feminine fashion – think soft fabrics, drapes, light and/or pastel colors and a certain modesty, the Dungeon aesthetic is overtly sexual, with sharply cut clothes without intricacies. The most sensual French lace is replaced by patent vinyl and female curves are celebrated in either provocative plunging necklines with back décolletés or hugged tightly in animalistic leather or why not, see-through latex garments. With such great potential to empower female sexuality, it’s no wonder Madonna was one of the first ambassadors of the Dungeon aesthetic back in the eighties.

 

The Multiple Facets of Femdom

The Dungeon aesthetic has been gentrified to be sold to the masses. Simili-latex dresses are sold as party dresses, lingerie now exists in leather, and couture designers such as Jitrois or Thierry Mugler have dressed pop stars in search of provocative, superheroine-worthy scene costumes. But what about the other facets of Femdom? Do all submissives fantasize about Dungeon dominatrices? As a pro domme of eight years myself, being allergic to latex, and someone who doesn’t work with whips not to mention in a dungeon, I have encountered an interesting diversity of fetishes nonetheless. My tools are verbal humiliation and dirty talk, hypnosis and most importantly Neuro Linguistic Programming in which I specialize (my alias The Manipulatrix™ refers to NLP being the science of manipulation), and my weapons of choice are Louboutin stiletto heels, couture dresses and custom-made lingerie. My clientele is essentially composed of wealthy businessmen or politicians with a thing for sky-high stilettos, long, sharp manicured nails and female supremacy. Some of them have a fetish for Louboutin heels (yes, it is sexual and more common that you would think), for long nails, for pantyhose or stockings, for lipstick or even for armpits… The reminder of a motherly figure is often the root of such fetishes, which is why these apparently soft weapons can become extremely powerful tools in the right hands. Between the glamour dominatrix described above and her dungeon counterpart, a vast array of fetish personalities exists: bratty princesses, hypnotic sorceresses, tomboy humiliatrices, sensual cuckoldresses… There are as many possible Femdom personas as there are grains of sand.

 

 

Rewriting the Rules

As an avid creator and consumer of fine art photography, as an adult video producer and art director, it was only logical that I would produce a film of some sort someday. “The Manipulatrix” is a video self-portrait born from both my history as a professional dominatrix and my visual influences, namely Andrew Blake (an American fetish porn movie director), Jean-Baptiste Mondino (a French director and fashion photographer), Nick Knight (an avant-garde fashion photographer), Steven Klein and Mert&Marcus. It is an attempt at showcasing my own personal fetishes, such as shoe dangling, spit fetish, nail fetish, lip fetish, fishnets fetish and of course money fetish (Financial Domination is what I am most known for). If some of these fetishes seem very niche to you, it’s because they are. Shoe dangling for instance isn’t such a frequent request, but it’s something that I am good at, being an ex-ballerina and professional leg model, and love to do. I believe it is up to us, dominatrices, to reshape the landscape of contemporary Female domination, by bringing our own strengths, kinks and fetishes (for our own body parts, or for specific fabrics) in the picture.

 

Theodora

 

 

This text is the exclusive property of The Only Theodora, © 2017.
Any reproduction and/or partial or complete use of content and services offered by The Only Theodora, by any means whatsoever, without the prior written authorization of The Only Theodora and affiliates, is strictly prohibited and constitutes an infringement under Articles L 335-2, Articles L 343-1 and following of the Code of Intellectual Property, national regulations and international conventions. Violation of these provisions subjects the offender and all persons responsible for criminal and civil penalties provided by law.

EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW

I have had the pleasure of being featured on The Cuckold Consultant for an exclusive interview. Read it on TheCuckoldConsultant.com


Q: What would you say are some of the most valuable things you could provide a man who submitted to you with that he isn’t getting right now in life or his current relationship?

A: Many men fantasize about letting an alluring, assertive woman take charge. Relinquishing control can be extremely freeing, provided it is to a woman whom you trust. Submission is an outlet. I strive to be that dangerous femme fatale in which you are still willing to put your trust. As a financial dominatrix, I demand a lot, but I give a lot back to whoever is willing to build something outside of the context of our sessions. To my best clients, I’m their mentor. I make them better men. I don’t only teach them how to financially sacrifice for a woman, I help them understand the female mind better. I often give them dating or relationship advice. And of course, being so demanding to my clients financially speaking often make them harder workers… I don’t just manage their finances, I help them set goals for themselves and teach them to plan ahead. Let’s say it’s my way of rewarding them for their (financial) devotion to me. Like in all relationships, it’s an exchange.

 

Q: What makes you different from all the other female dommes out there?

A: Unlike latex-clad dominatrices who session in their dungeon, using whips and crops, I dominate with my words, my attitude, my body language, in five stars hotels, Michelin restaurants or high end designer stores, wearing haute couture clothing and Louboutin heels. I believe female supremacy can be expressed with taste and elegance, be it in the way I dress or the way I talk. I am a true Manipulatrix in the sense that I don’t force my clients to submit like in traditional domination, I make them want to, by making it their idea. When I’ve trademarked the term to make it my brand, it wasn’t very common at all. If you searched for it on social media, there were a handful of occurrences at most. It was perfect to describe what I do. There are many online dominatrices who, not unlike me, have traded the whips for words. But while you would encounter many hypnodommes, femdom spoiled princesses or humiliatrices on the internet, there weren’t that many manipulatrices – or dommes who would describe themselves as such. Hypnosis is only a weapon amongst many others for me, and I don’t identify as a bratty princess who has demands nor as a lifestyle humiliatrix who’s turned on by the psychological pain she inflicts. On the contrary, I am essentially a seductress. I like dirty talking rather than verbal humiliation. Seduction is a huge part of what I do. And I’m an expert at NLP, which is also known as the science of manipulation. Hence The Manipulatrix™…

 

Q: You coined the term Psydom. How would you explain this to someone who had never heard the term before?

A: Psydom is the contraction of Psychological Domination. While a traditional dominatrix uses corporal punishment or ropes and chains to restrain or recondition someone physically, a psydomme uses psychological weapons such as verbal humiliation, hypnosis, NLP or non-verbal communication to change a behavior, restrain or hurt someone psychologically. Many forms of dominations fall under the umbrella of Psydom. Hypnodommes, humiliatrices, even findommes can be considered psydommes. A lot of practices such as consensual blackmail, cuckolding, or feminization encompass an important psychological dimension. I coined the term Psydom because I felt it was lacking. Psydom isn’t rare at all, it’s actually very common. Online domination has really exploded these past few years, and the definition of the word Dominatrix is, more than ever, bound to evolve. But the word still evokes the professional sadist who practices the art of inflicting physical pain to men in her dungeon. Psydom/psydomme felt more accurate.

 

Q: What was it like being the daughter of a psychologist and hypnotherapist? What role did that play in helping you be able to dominate men today in the ways they crave to be dominated?

A: It offered me an amazing insight into the human mind. From my youngest age, I was very good at reading people, and I was a good listener. I have always hated conflicts and loud, vocal arguments. I always was the quiet one in school. But that didn’t mean I was weak and powerless, on the contrary. Although I might not have realized at first, I was constantly using NLP to solve conflicts or get what I wanted, just like my parents would do naturally during any interaction. I was extremely good at getting people on my side. It was just natural. NLP really is my mother tongue. I also grew up surrounded by psychology, NLP and hypnosis books, it fascinated me. I have read every single one of them. I was still in my teens when I learned hypnosis. It was a game for me. I believe that thanks to all of this, I am able to connect on a much deeper emotional level with my clients, to have a very special bond with them.

 

Q: What are three of the biggest thrills/enjoyments you get out of being a domme?

A: The freedom, of course. Financial, professional, artistic freedom. It’s fantastic to be my own boss, to be able to express my creativity and my views on female supremacy / female domination while making tremendous amounts of money doing it. And the lifestyle that goes with a Dominatrix career is exhilarating. I travel the world, I have seen the most beautiful places, the most exciting cities… I have nice things, too!

 

Q: In general, have you found there to be an average “type” of man who seeks to submit to you or to women in general? (For example, there’s the notion that most men who seek out services from dominatrices such as yourself often occupy high positions of power in their professional lives.)

A: My clientele is very high profile indeed: they are either successful businessmen, CEOs, or politicians from all over the world, especially Shanghai, Singapore and Hong Kong, as well as Australia and New Zealand since I live between Paris and Hong Kong. The higher the position of a man in his career, the more he seems to seek release in submission. I’m a financial dominatrix, so men who come to me usually are quite wealthy, they look for the ultimate thrill of spending, which is hard for them to experience since they can afford everything. They come to me because they know that I can push them to their limits. Most of the time, they rebuild quickly afterwards anyway… To them, there’s nothing sexier than getting ruined by being (willingly) hypnotized, manipulated and blackmailed by a French femme fatale expert in her craft.

 

Q: What are some of the most common experiences men ask you to provide them with/fetishes men ask you to gratify? Where do you think the need for such experiences comes from/why do they have these particular fetishes?

A: Financial Domination is what I’m known for, so obviously the most common request is that I take total control of their finances. I’ve been doing it for over 8 years so I’m extremely well versed in it. It isn’t about taking all of it, you want your client to have just enough to cover his basic living expenses. It’s about being on the very edge, it’s the idea of flirting with financial ruin that is appealing, not actual bankruptcy. Just like with corporal punishment, you don’t want to send your client straight to the hospital. You want to hurt him as much as he can stand but without leaving any permanent damage. Hypnosis is also highly requested by my clients. Giving up control of one’s mind is an extremely appealing outlet to anyone who has high responsibilities in their professional lives.

 

Q: What advice would you have for men who want to submit to their wives, but are afraid to broach the subject?

A: If you are a man who wants to submit to his wife, I would highly suggest trying to make it less about you being in the role of the submissive and more about your wife being in the role of the dominant. Less about you, more about her. Open the door for her to envision herself as a dominant women, so she can come up with her own vision of your fantasy. Encourage her when she experiments: “You drive me crazy when you do … to me”, “You’re so sexy when you are …”. And you can even follow with a daring: “You have so much power over me… I would totally lose my mind if you were doing … to me”. You would be surprised at how much more creative your wife will get…

 

Q: What books would you recommend men read if they want to understand themselves and their submissive desires on a deeper level?

A: Any book from Carl Jung would be a good place to start. Although he was Freud’s protégé, unlike him, he believed in the eventuality of a feminine side in all men, and was convinced that the characteristics of a gender (such as supposedly male dominance in western culture) were socially acquired, rather than innate… I believe that there is probably more fluidity to submissive versus dominant personalities in our sexual lives, just like sexual orientation or gender identity aren’t all black or white.

 

Q: What are 3-5 things you like doing for fun when you’re not busy dominating and manipulating your clients?

A: I am always reading hypnosis or psychology books, whether I’m on a plane, on the beach, or by my swimming pool. The human psyche fascinates me. When I’m not reading, I’m writing. Prose, poetry… Songs. I love music. I was a singer in a rock band for a few years. I regularly write and produce records. I also love directing and producing fetish/erotica films. Working as a professional model for years taught me a lot about lighting, photography and post production. I’m a big fan of Andrew Blake’s work, and at one point in my life, one of my biggest fantasies was to be able to star in and direct such films one day. Now that I have both the knowledge and technique to produce my own films, I find it such an amazing outlet to my creativity… I am currently working on my next film. My first short film can be seen here.