Tag Archives: Power Exchange

Interview for SputnikNews

I was recently interviewed by SputnikNews to speak about sex, power and cryptocurrencies… Read the entire interview on Sputniknews.com or keep scrolling…


Sex, Power & Cryptocurrencies: Financial Dominatrix on Expensive Modern Fetish

 

Forget everything you know about the adult sex industry – financial domination is here to change the game, with the cryptocurrency evolution cementing the flexibility of the process. Financial dominatrix Theodora spoke to Sputnik about the role of digital money, her “cryptominers” and what it means to be in control of someone’s bank accounts.

She has been doing it for over 8 years now. Theodora, the financial dominatrix, who is originally from France and currently residing in Paris, explains that she is not a sex worker in the traditional notion of it.

“I am in a very grey area because what is sexual to my clients is not sexual to me. There is no penetrative sex, so it is hard to define my work as sex work in France. I don’t qualify for this,” she told Sputnik.

What she does do is practice financial domination with her clients who are located all over the world — politicians, CEOs, finance professionals. In other words: people with big responsibilities and even bigger pockets.

 

Sputnik: What does being a financial dominatrix mean?

Theodora: Financial domination is a power exchange based on the finances of the person who wants to be dominated. The tool for transferring power in this case is money. When I started to do financial domination, it wasn’t a business for me. It was a fetish game. I used to go to swingers or BDSM parties and people would submit to me — they were my play partners. Because it is financial domination, they would give me money.

My clients obviously know about money, it is so much more exciting if I take it from them. They want to feel excitement from money being taken out of their accounts but they don’t want to actually be broke. That’s the fantasy but it’s not the point. We discuss the limits with them. Everything I do I make sure it is consensual and they want it. That’s the difference between a good dominant and someone who doesn’t understand the concept. Financial domination is becoming more and more popular because it is not taboo anymore to say you are a financial dominatrix or submissive.

At first I didn’t see it as a business.

 

Sputnik: When did you start accepting cryptocurrency?

Theodora: I started accepting cryptocurrency as deposits. It is safer for any sex worker and it also was the case for me. It means that the person is very serious in their request. I started to get cryptocurrencies very early on, probably 5 or 6 years ago. For me these were gifts from my play partners, who would give me cryptocurrency and back then I didn’t know how much it was worth. I accepted it and created crypto-addresses where I would collect it and of course its value grew. Now I’m starting to make it a more important part of my business because growth in the value of cryptocurrency, it’s becoming interesting financially.

Now I have my own website, people can message me but I rarely meet them. I don’t need to meet them.

 

Sputnik: How does cryptocurrency compare to more traditional money processors in your experience?

Theodora: We can’t use processors like PayPal as adult entertainers or sex workers because they would shut down our accounts. There are clipsites that offer a way to receive tributes, but the downside is they take very big cuts, usually about 30 or 40 percent. If you are into financial domination, you are more likely to get very big sums of money, and using cryptocurrencies would get you 100% of it.

With financial domination, [we] don’t actually charge for a session. It is part of the game I have with my clients. There is a certain budget and I am within its limits. Of course, cryptocurrency evolves and its value changes, but then my rate will evolve with the client, as I am adjusting to the client’s budget at the moment.

 

Sputnik: How much do you make per month in cryptocurrencies and how do you spend it?

Theodora: It varies a lot. It’s usually between 5 and 20 thousand [euro], it varies a lot. There is no one month like the other.

I like to invest in smaller cryptocurrencies because [they] are the most stable ones for now. I believe that some of them will be very big later on. Everyone talks about Bitcoin and obviously it was the first and the most well-known cryptocurrency. But I feel like other cryptocurrencies will be more important in the future. I don’t have a financial background, but the funny thing is many of my clients were in finance and they talked to me and I learned from them. Now, I am teaching [my clients]. I really like Monero, which is one of the safest, it leaves no trace and doesn’t cost as much per transaction as Bitcoin. With Bitcoin you have to wait for a couple of days to get the money — that’s a long time, whereas with some others it is almost instant.

 

Sputnik: What is femdom hypnosis?

Theodora: Some people would like to submit but find it hard to give up control mentally. For them, the physical state of domination is not enough, that’s where hypnosis comes in. It gives them, what is called the “subspace” they want to reach. They relinquish control to me via hypnosis.

 

Sputnik: When you are given control of a person’s bank account as part of financial domination, what are your actions?

Theodora: It depends on the client. Some of them will be turned on by paying my bills, so I would pay my bills with their credit card. Some like to buy sexy lingerie for me, so I would shop and show them what I bought myself with their money. Some just want to see big numbers withdrawn from their accounts.

Most of the time they don’t know what turns them on, so I have to experiment and when I find what it is — that’s what I will do.

 

Sputnik: Do you have people mining cryptocurrencies for you?

Theodora: I make some of my clients buy mining computers, which generate calculations to create money that goes to my cryptoaccount. The number of people doing it for me evolves, but it’s at least 10-15 people.

The people that find out about me on social media wouldn’t attend swingers or fetish parties. They wouldn’t have the same budget for financial domination. I try to make financial domination more accessible to them — I would provide them with opportunities to send me smaller tributes, knowing that I would never get the same amounts as from real-time clients.

 

Sputnik: What are you plans for the future?

Theodora: I have a lot of projects right now. My main focus would be to continue producing videos and art related to fetish and domination.

 

Sputnik: Are you taxed for your work?

Theodora: My videos are taxable and in France the taxman takes a huge cut. So it is a good thing that I have financial domination going on with all the donations. Donations are not taxable, provided it is within a limit of 50,000 twice a year.

 

EROTIC EXTORTION & BLACKMAIL 101

extortion: ɪkˈstɔːʃ(ə)n, ɛkˈstɔːʃ(ə)n/ noun
the practice of obtaining something, especially money, through force or threats

erotic: ɪˈrɒtɪk/ adjective
relating to or tending to arouse sexual desire or excitement


There is a kink that very few actually dare to engage in, for fear of going too far, despite its ever-popular status all over the internet. Often wrongly called blackmail (which, indeed, always involves extortion), Erotic Extortion, the art of obtaining money through force or threat from a consenting and tantalized victim, is possibly the most attractive and thrilling psycho-kink to engage in. But how far can this take you, and what does it entail? Read further and try not to be hooked…

 

The most natural psycho-kink

Erotic Extortion can be considered a sub genre of Financial Domination. So, let’s take a look at the dynamics of power exchange in Financial Domination first. In contemporary western society, money equals power, and said power isn’t traditionally given to women and men in equal measure. On the contrary, with gender pay gap being the norm, and sexist laws still being applicable in numerous not-so-remote parts of the world, women are overpowered by default. Not to mention that on top of this, men currently hold 99% of world wealth… Therefore, wealth isn’t only a status symbol of power: rather, it is the power, and money, its instrument.

Relinquishing power to a dominant female is a common way for powerful men with high responsibilities to find release. It is, understandably, a way for them to balance their lives as daytime leaders with stressful careers where they have to be in control all the time. And since actual power lies in money, it makes Financial Domination the most tangible form of domination to them. Better yet, and in a reciprocal manner, it also is to many female dominants. The fact that western women hold only 1% of the world wealth and have limited access to high profile careers with responsibilities highly reinforces this polarization. Financial Domination gives women the power back not only on an individual or intrapersonal level, but on a societal level.

Which is probably why a vast majority of dominant women in western society is turned on by the idea of getting paid, and rarely the opposite, while men, in turn, often find paying for their kink an additional turn-on. If you have ever been to a strip club, you have probably witnessed a very popular form of erotic extortion before your very eyes. An exotic dancer is in action, doing a lap dance, stripping and teasing all she can, then “threatens” her customer to stop her dance, in the most seductive way, unless more money is paid immediately… Is there a sexiest way to illustrate the eroticism in consensual extortion?

 

From Erotic Extortion to Blackmail

While Erotic Extortion revolves around demanding money, with added threats of various nature, Blackmail is an erotic extortion which threat is specifically to expose the consenting victim. Depending on what other kinks and fetishes said consenting victim is known to have, the threat can be to expose these to a third person or to a group of people, be it a wife, a boss, some colleagues or whoever has an important role enough for the exposure to present a real threat. We have this saying in French, that the apple tastes better when the worm is in the fruit (although, if I may add, the worm is always best avoided…). So, how far can this seemingly dangerous game go?

Here’s the thing with Blackmail fantasy : it is just that. A fantasy. By actually exposing your blackmail submissive, you are involving someone external to this BDSM practice without their consent, thus crossing the line between fantasy and reality. Moreover, the law is the law, and whatever contract you may write or sign (this is especially true for Blackmail fantasy), publicly exposing someone is called defamation and is a criminal offense punishable by law, consent or not. So what’s a domme to do? Now that we made it clear that blackmail really is only a fantasy, where is all the thrill in Blackmail fantasy?

Every power exchange in BDSM is first and foremost of a consensual nature. I consider my way of engaging in domination Safe, Sane and Consensual (SSC), as opposed to Risk-Aware Consensual Kink (RACK) – I reserve the latter for my long-term subs that I know extremely well, under exceptional circumstances. I feel that it is my duty to provide a safe space for my subs to experiment with their kinks and explore their fantasies, without being judged or, most importantly, put in danger. Most new or inexperienced subs will beg for RACK, especially on the heat of the moment, although they eventually won’t be able to handle it. The whole point of this kink is to be able to provide the thrill of RACK without actually going there… That is where the knowledge of psychology, body language and NLP technique comes in handy. A skilled Psydomme will know how to push her sub’s buttons and flirt with the limits without ever even needing to cross them, for she will be able to recognize consensual non-consent and know exactly how far she can go…

 

Now, will you be able to handle the heat? Apply for the ultimate Erotic Extortion experience with me here

 

 

This text is the exclusive property of The Only Theodora, © 2017.
Any reproduction and/or partial or complete use of content and services offered by The Only Theodora, by any means whatsoever, without the prior written authorization of The Only Theodora and affiliates, is strictly prohibited and constitutes an infringement under Articles L 335-2, Articles L 343-1 and following of the Code of Intellectual Property, national regulations and international conventions. Violation of these provisions subjects the offender and all persons responsible for criminal and civil penalties provided by law.

HOW TO SUBMIT

Many of my subs were totally new to Femdom when they came to submit to me. What may seem obvious to some more experienced subs isn’t necessarily evident for newer ones. And as if the Femdom etiquette wasn’t complicated enough, even dommes themselves often seem confused as to which title they should go by, unsure of how to act accordingly, resulting in even more confused subs… So, how do you refer to a domme? How to be a good sub? What should you avoid to do so you don’t come across as rude? How do you truly submit?


How should I refer to you?

My name is Theodora. Goddess is my title. Which means most people will call me Theodora, except you: you will refer to me as Goddess Theodora, or simply Goddess. It may sound obvious, but even outside of a Dominant/Submissive relationship, mistakes are often made. For example, I have seen publications about me referring to me as “Goddess Theodora”. This is understandable when the article is written by a sub, otherwise people outside of a D/S relationship with me should simply refer to me as Theodora. I am French, and nicknames aren’t really a thing where I am from, so by all means, avoid calling me Theo unless I gave you my permission to do so, which is very unlikely to happen if you are a sub. Nicknames are reserved for close friends.

 

Goddess, Queen, Princess, Mistress… Who does what?

Subs should always use their domme’s title, capitalized, when referring to them. Don’t try using any other title that you fancy: even though your intentions are good, it may come across as rude to do so. While some dommes go by the title “Princess”, in which case it is required from you to refer to them as such, any domme whose title is “Goddess”, “Queen” or “Empress” will most likely take “Princess” as an insult. Not that a “Princess” is worth less than a “Goddess”…

The difference lies in their personality and how the power exchange is viewed: a Princess will have demands, and wants to be spoiled. A Goddess, rather than being spoiled, expects to be worshipped, hence the notion of tributes. It’s a matter of vocabulary. “Princess” conveys possible notions of brattiness and youth, it often has a lolita vibe to it. “Mistress” is a different story : it conveys notions of closeness and/or intimacy, of seduction even, which is why it is a popular title amongst BDSM dommes who engage in the most intimate practices in physical domination, such as pegging, for example. “Goddess”, on the contrary, conveys notion of inaccessibility, of idealism. It also entails a strong, iconic imagery. Don’t expect the same practices from a Goddess than from a Mistress. Also, if a Mistress doesn’t always have a face in order to protect her privacy, a Goddess on the opposite, capitalizes on her physical attributes. She is the icon of her own cult.

Now, the number of titles that you will come across in the scene is ever-growing, but these are the titles you are most likely to encounter. I, myself, have elected to be a Goddess. I will tolerate to be approached as “Majesty”, but you will be expected to correct yourself and call me by the right title when further interacting with me. “Princess” or “Mistress”, on the other hand, will not be considered acceptable. Making sure you are calling your domme by the right title is a great first step into submitting.

 

I want to become your slave, Goddess!

At least, you got the title right… But now, you need to understand the difference between a sub and a slave. We all know what true slavery is: History has shown us how serious it could get. Slavery to Female Dominants is no different, except for one thing… It is consensual. A slave gives up his right to choose: he will be expected to obey without question. His only purpose is to serve. He doesn’t expect anything in return. It’s a one-way relationship. A slave doesn’t get to “want” anything, he will not make demands. He will totally surrender to his domme, who then becomes responsible for his safety. He belongs to her, she owns him. A sub is a person who wishes to engage in a Dominant/Submissive relationship, where he will get to explore fetishes in the role of… The submissive, obviously. He will be listened to by the dominant, who will decide whether to grant his possible requests or not, depending of their own fetishes. Again, that may sound obvious, but the number of subs coming to me introducing themselves as slaves, only to make demands, negotiate or question my orders at the first opportunity is high enough to be worth an article. Knowing what you really want out of domination start with knowing how to define yourself first.

 

How do I approach you? What is a good slave?

You exist to make my existence better. I already have everything I want, the only thing I can never get enough of is, you guessed it, money. I have enough shoes or clothes I don’t need already, therefore buying me sexy gifts is a privilege reserved to my owned moneyslaves. It shows affection rather than devotion. A good sub/slave knows this and will show his devotion by tributing consistently. I’m sure you noticed that I already have many devoted finsubs and that I am highly in demand, consequently, only real sacrifice will get you noticed. Approach respectfully with a monetary tribute that reflects your motivation to be owned by me.

 

I want to do real time sessions… What do you do and how much do you charge?

I am sure you are aware that I specialize in financial domination. But it would be more accurate to say that I specialize in psychological domination, as opposed to physical domination. My real time sessions consist essentially of Femdom hypnosis, foot and shoe worship, spit/smoke fetish, cashmeets, shopping sprees… And Contractual Financial Domination (terms will only be discussed in private). Real time sessions are mostly reserved for my finsubs and owned financial slaves, who have proven consistent with their tithes and tributes. Which is why I don’t charge a fixed price for sessions: they are a part of the findom relationship I have with my subs, and as such, how much I will ask for a session will vary: my moneyslaves are expected to do their best in terms of financial sacrifice for me. If you aren’t one of my subs yet and really want to meet me, don’t expect it to be cheap. I will expect real sacrifice from you. Never ask me “how much”. If it doesn’t hurt, it probably isn’t enough. If you want a fixed price, you should order a custom clip from me instead. That will get you noticed.

 

What is financial domination?

I get asked about financial domination many times a day, by subs and aspiring dommes alike. This fetish takes root in psychological domination. It’s only a different way of viewing power exchange, where money is the fetish. Basically, the financial sub surrenders his finances to his domme, or he will let his domme take control of them, as a way to give up his financial freedom. No wonder the number of findommes in the scene is ever-growing… Although it may sound like easy money for the aspiring findomme, true financial domination requires both profound knowledge of psychology and experience in female domination. Moreover, financial domination rarely exists on its own. Rather, it is only one fetish among many others.

 

Ready to submit? Contact me to surrender to your Only Goddess…

 

 

This text is the exclusive property of The Only Theodora™, © April 2017.
Any reproduction and/or partial or complete use of content and services offered by The Only Theodora™, by any means whatsoever, without the prior written authorization of The Only Theodora™ and affiliates, is strictly prohibited and constitutes an infringement under Articles L 335-2, Articles L 343-1 and following of the Code of Intellectual Property, national regulations and international conventions. Violation of these provisions subjects the offender and all persons responsible for criminal and civil penalties provided by law and will be subject to prosecution.