extortion: ɪkˈstɔːʃ(ə)n, ɛkˈstɔːʃ(ə)n/ noun
the practice of obtaining something, especially money, through force or threats
erotic: ɪˈrɒtɪk/ adjective
relating to or tending to arouse sexual desire or excitement
There is a kink that very few actually dare to engage in, for fear of going too far, despite its ever-popular status all over the internet. Often wrongly called blackmail (which, indeed, always involves extortion), Erotic Extortion, the art of obtaining money through force or threat from a consenting and tantalized victim, is possibly the most attractive and thrilling psycho-kink to engage in. But how far can this take you, and what does it entail? Read further and try not to be hooked…
The most natural psycho-kink
Erotic Extortion can be considered a sub genre of Financial Domination. So, let’s take a look at the dynamics of power exchange in Financial Domination first. In contemporary western society, money equals power, and said power isn’t traditionally given to women and men in equal measure. On the contrary, with gender pay gap being the norm, and sexist laws still being applicable in numerous not-so-remote parts of the world, women are overpowered by default. Not to mention that on top of this, men currently hold 99% of world wealth… Therefore, wealth isn’t only a status symbol of power: rather, it is the power, and money, its instrument.
Relinquishing power to a dominant female is a common way for powerful men with high responsibilities to find release. It is, understandably, a way for them to balance their lives as daytime leaders with stressful careers where they have to be in control all the time. And since actual power lies in money, it makes Financial Domination the most tangible form of domination to them. Better yet, and in a reciprocal manner, it also is to many female dominants. The fact that western women hold only 1% of the world wealth and have limited access to high profile careers with responsibilities highly reinforces this polarization. Financial Domination gives women the power back not only on an individual or intrapersonal level, but on a societal level.
Which is probably why a vast majority of dominant women in western society is turned on by the idea of getting paid, and rarely the opposite, while men, in turn, often find paying for their kink an additional turn-on. If you have ever been to a strip club, you have probably witnessed a very popular form of erotic extortion before your very eyes. An exotic dancer is in action, doing a lap dance, stripping and teasing all she can, then “threatens” her customer to stop her dance, in the most seductive way, unless more money is paid immediately… Is there a sexiest way to illustrate the eroticism in consensual extortion?
From Erotic Extortion to Blackmail
While Erotic Extortion revolves around demanding money, with added threats of various nature, Blackmail is an erotic extortion which threat is specifically to expose the consenting victim. Depending on what other kinks and fetishes said consenting victim is known to have, the threat can be to expose these to a third person or to a group of people, be it a wife, a boss, some colleagues or whoever has an important role enough for the exposure to present a real threat. We have this saying in French, that the apple tastes better when the worm is in the fruit (although, if I may add, the worm is always best avoided…). So, how far can this seemingly dangerous game go?
Here’s the thing with Blackmail fantasy : it is just that. A fantasy. By actually exposing your blackmail submissive, you are involving someone external to this BDSM practice without their consent, thus crossing the line between fantasy and reality. Moreover, the law is the law, and whatever contract you may write or sign (this is especially true for Blackmail fantasy), publicly exposing someone is called defamation and is a criminal offense punishable by law, consent or not. So what’s a domme to do? Now that we made it clear that blackmail really is only a fantasy, where is all the thrill in Blackmail fantasy?
Every power exchange in BDSM is first and foremost of a consensual nature. I consider my way of engaging in domination Safe, Sane and Consensual (SSC), as opposed to Risk-Aware Consensual Kink (RACK) – I reserve the latter for my long-term subs that I know extremely well, under exceptional circumstances. I feel that it is my duty to provide a safe space for my subs to experiment with their kinks and explore their fantasies, without being judged or, most importantly, put in danger. Most new or inexperienced subs will beg for RACK, especially on the heat of the moment, although they eventually won’t be able to handle it. The whole point of this kink is to be able to provide the thrill of RACK without actually going there… That is where the knowledge of psychology, body language and NLP technique comes in handy. A skilled Psydomme will know how to push her sub’s buttons and flirt with the limits without ever even needing to cross them, for she will be able to recognize consensual non-consent and know exactly how far she can go…
Now, will you be able to handle the heat? Apply for the ultimate Erotic Extortion experience with me here…
This text is the exclusive property of The Only Theodora, © 2017.
Any reproduction and/or partial or complete use of content and services offered by The Only Theodora, by any means whatsoever, without the prior written authorization of The Only Theodora and affiliates, is strictly prohibited and constitutes an infringement under Articles L 335-2, Articles L 343-1 and following of the Code of Intellectual Property, national regulations and international conventions. Violation of these provisions subjects the offender and all persons responsible for criminal and civil penalties provided by law.